Ursula

Fri, 03 Dec 2004 07:27:38 GMT


karma5_0 is love
brought to you by the isLove Generator

Sat, 27 Nov 2004 00:00:44 GMT

So today was supposed to be my last night at Denny's. I have spent the last year and a half of my life learning every little trick to serving, every order, every side work secret. I can tell you anything about that store. And it's all gone.

Gone are my days of making deep fried ice cream. No more smoking blunts in front of the store until I was too fucked up to move. No more sorrid notes from lonely couples looking for young pussy to share and devour. Gone! All gone! No more reverse Oreo sandwhiches. No more feeding the masses of RHPS. No more drunks spewing their dinners in my parking lot, which I guess isnt my parking lot anymore. No more cops letting me play with their tasers. Gone are my regulars. Gone! : (

Gone are the Wal Mast bitches who constantly would pat their nappy weaves and braids and run my ass to the ground for 73 cents. Gone are the managers fucking the serves behind their wives backs. Gone are people no calling/no showing and having jobs the next day. No more staying behind 3 hours after I am supposed to go home because I am doing the cleaning no one else has done. No more chasing walk outs into the parking lot to get my money. No more drunk men pinching my ass. Wait... I won't miss that at all.

By no means do I want a medal for the shit I dealt with, or even a thank you. It would have just been nice if Amanda had said goodbye.

But it's ok. I have moved onto my next plane of serving existance. I work at a REAL restaurant now.

Thu, 18 Nov 2004 18:29:26 GMT

I like my new job, but it's new so its kinda tough. Also these newxt two days = hell on earth. I work today from 3 pm to 12am new job then 12:30 am to 4 am old job. And tomorrrow I do 3pm to 11 new job then 11:30 to 6 am new job. Poop.

Here's some of the pros and cons

Pros: They let me sample the beer
Everyone is friendly; no baptism by fire
Devo and Bruce work there
More money/Less work
Excellent dicounts and great food
Managers are super cool and understanding.

Cons
No pot at work
Disney scum
Long drive
Less cussin'

Sun, 14 Nov 2004 23:47:13 GMT

hmmm. I think this icon will work. Let's see..

Thu, 14 Oct 2004 00:41:11 GMT

So Shafter McShaftyFace Shafter is at HHN I am cleaning the apartment for our new Pet Fuchs and downloading/stealing songs from the internet. Shafting Bastard Shafter.

I realized how sad my life was today. I was making some eggs scrambled with cheese (the only way i eat them) and I was pulling a Peg Bundy (smoking) and ashed in my eggs. And shamefully ate them anyway. I saw the ash and pretended it was pepper.

I don't see any huge flocks of birds in Florida and it makes me sad.

I am going to clean a little more and get good and shit faced.

Wed, 06 Oct 2004 16:37:41 GMT

I had bad dreams last night. Every time I fell asleep I woke up an hour or two later in a cold sweat.

I dreamt that a pizza guy came to the house and tripped on the stairs on his way out. He hit his head on the concrete and was killed instantly. I knelt down next to the body to see if I could see where he hit his head and he started bleeding. I got his blood in my mouth, I could taste it. It was thick. I rain inside and washed my mouth out. I grabbed Dan's phone and tried to call 911 but I couldnt get through. I tried my phone and Keegans phone too. No one cared that there was a dead . I ran around the apartment complex trying to get help cause there was a dead guy on my porch and no one cared.

I also dreamt that I driving by the ocean and got out to walk along the beach. The water was so blue and pure and the waves were maybe 20 feet high. They broke and crashed onto the shore. The waves got bigger and bigger and I felt myself being sucked back toward the water, the force was so strong it knocked me down and I grabbed at the earth. I grasped huge chucks of sand, fruitlessly trying to gain a hold. I was pulled back into the water and pushed forward on a giant wave. I crashed and rolled into the shore and was sucked back again. Over and over.

I dreamt Keegan cleaned my room. And you all know how I feel about people touching my stuff.

I fell asleep on Dan's futon holding my glasses. I thought I was awake. Someone kept walking in the room and looking at me and touching my head and shoulders. It'd shuffle around the room and leave and I would hear it walking around the apartment. I didn't see it cause I kept my eyes closed. It kept doing it and I didnt know who/what it was but I knew it was bad. I woke up and thought I was still in the dream. No one was home but I would hear noises from the outside and think it was coming from inside the apartment. I was a-ferred.

Wed, 29 Sep 2004 15:01:35 GMT

A thing from Beka... let the HTML gods be on my side.

. age: 20
. height: 5'9''
. location: Orrrrlando
. hair color: red
. eye color: blue
. sexual preference: not in the ass
. what brand of deodorant do you use: i like mens deodorant
. do you like pickles: no
. do you watch porn: sometimes
. Do you have any pets: 2 kitties
. who are you gonna vote for: Kerry
. do you have your own phone line: a cell
. your thoughts on abortion: pro choice
. do you like Britney Spears: no
. what do you want to do with your life: Not be a waitress
. ever been butt naked bangin' on the bathroom floor: yes
. would you ever get plastic surgery, if so, on what? Never would, but I would like to suck all the fat out of me
. biggest redneck you know: Devin?
. do you think foreign accents are sexy: oui oui
. do you like hot dogs: no!!
. last time you went to the doctor: When I had bleeding lung disease
. last time you used the restroom: a few hours ago
. most attractive person you know: Mallory and Meredith

. piercings: Use to have 9 but now only 2 : (
. tattoos = 1
. shoe size = 10-11
. favorite color = blue and purple
. describe yourself in four words = sneaky, shaven, pale, hardcore
. siblings = 2
. underwear = rarely
. coffee cup = old school denny's... the ones that say Denny's right on them!

last....
. cd you listened to = Best of Leonard Cohen
. person you called = Dan
. person that has called you = Dan
. person you emailed = ... Dan
. person who emailed you = ...Dan...
. you have a bf or gf = bf
. you have a crush on someone = no maybe no
. you wish you could live somewhere else = yes
. you thought about suicide = no

. others find you attractive = probably but my self esteem wants me to say doubtful
. you do drugs = yes
. you smoke = yes
. you like roller coasters = yes
. you write in cursive or print = print
. long distance relationships = lacking in trust
. using someone = ew
. suicide = I wish I was there to hug them
. killing people = Naw, you can make them wish they were dead
. premarital sex = yes

do you....
. like the taste of blood = yes
. believe in love = yes
. believe in soul mates = yes
. believe in love at first sight = yes
. believe in god = no
. ever cried over a girl/boy = yes
. ever lied to someone = sometimes
. ever been arrested = no
. ever dated anyone who's in your lj friends list = yes
. kissed anyone on your lj friends list = yes
. ever been in a fist fight = yes

what...
. are you scared of = shark, aliens, bugs, robot voices
. what are you like in relationships = needy

number...
. of times I have been in love? = 2
. of times I have had my heart broken? = oh god it hurts so bad
. of hearts I have broken? = possibly millions
. of men I've slept with? = 7 i'll admit to
. of girls I've slept with? = 0
. of continents I have lived on? = 1
. of drugs taken illegally? = once again, possibly millions
. of people I would classify as true, could trust with my life type friends? = 4
. what (illegal) drugs (if any) have you done?: I smoke pot all the time, I was once heavely into E and opium. i've also done my fair share of shrooms and acid. I've tried coke and crack a few times. I've smoke H once. But now I only smoke pot.

. What's the best gift you've ever received?: from a boy? my cute hippie clothes. from anyone? my glasses
What's the best concert you've ever attended?: Radiohead
. If you had to give up either music or sex for the rest of your life, which would you pick?: Sex.
. What's your favorite bad-for-you food?:: butter... thats right, straight butter
. What rockstar would you be a permanent groupie for, no questions asked?:: Jerry, man.
. If you could lose (or get back to re-lose) your virginity to any person living or dead, who would it be?: Freddie M, before the AIDS
. Are you a dog person or a cat person?:: cat
. What's your favorite US city?:: New Hope
. Favorite curse word?: Fuggin' Cock
. Have you ever had a romantic/sexual encounter with a rock star?:: No
. What's the craziest/stupidest thing you've ever done while drunk?:: Smack. Dudes, just dont touch it.
::What current trend do you think is ridiculous and wish would go away immediately?:: Low Carb diets. Love who you are AND EAT THE FUCKING BREAD.

HAVE YOU EVER...
[Said "I love you" and meant it?] yes
[Been to New York?] yes
[Been to Florida?] No!
[California?] no
[Hawaii?] no
[Mexico?] no
[China? Japan?] No
[Canada?] no
[Danced nekkid?] All the time

EITHER OR...
[Apples or bananas?] apples
[Red or blue?] blue
[WalMart or Target?] Wal mart
[Math or English?] English
[High school or college?] I wish I were in College
Future
[do you want to get married] yes
[if so, what age would you like to be married] when its right
[who will you marry] who loves me best
[what do you want to do when you grow up] a 60 foot tall robot.

Dan ! Look out!

Mon, 27 Sep 2004 06:01:44 GMT

eXpressive: 5/10
Practical: 2/10
Physical: 5/10
Giver: 4/10

You are a RSYT--Reserved Sentimental Physical Taker. This makes you a Brute.

You are volatile, stormy and incredibly sexy. You have a hungry, fascinating way about you. You are a riot when you're happy and a menace when you're angry. You are strangely appealing to your target sex, and they find themselves drawn in despite their wiser instincts.

In your professional life, your type makes you a star, a force to be reckoned with, and the one people trust when they have a problem that's beyond them. In a relationship, you are a bull in a china shop, and if your partner isn't clever s/he may get plowed down. I could warn you to be more communicative with and sensitive to your partner, but that's just not going to happen. You don't ask much of your significant other, so you have no tolerance for high demands on you. For you, it's either love it or leave it.

You work hard and play hard. You enjoy a good drink. You have had many lovers and will have many more. People try and fail to get you into bed. They want you for a friend and fear you as an enemy.

This may not sound too flattering, but the truth is that because you know yourself so well you're happier in a relationship than most everybody else.

Hemingway would write about you. Maybe Hemingway is you.

Of the 108659 people who have taken this quiz, 2.7 % are this type.

No mas! No mas!

Mon, 27 Sep 2004 05:50:11 GMT

So, I went to my SisTORs house for the hurricane, again. I called Keegan and found out that Kirkman didn't lose power, again. I watched the news and saw Orlando wasn't swallowed up into the core of the earth, again. So, I'm stuck here, on yet another day off. Painfully sober. Again.

Dank lost power, which sucks for him, but we are traveling back home at dawn. I want to sleep in my own bed again and shower in my own shower.

Work fucking sucks hardcore balls lately. I missed so much work from the hurricanes I'm dead broke, but my brother in law lent me some cash. I tried to pay him back but he wouldn't take it.

I talked to the ex a few days after Political Rally Tuesday. He's back with his ex now. The one he promised me he was over when he was with me, the one he never wanted to see again. I don't think it should bother me as much as it does. I didn't want to be with him anymore, hence the leaving him. I have someone else now. So what's the deal? I'm pissed off that he lied to me and that he used me. I think I am a good person. I can cook, I'm almost kinda pretty, I'm intelligent and oh so witty. And when I left he didn't care. He wanted that sickly psycho bitch. So fuck him. He can have her and her drama. And she'll leave him again, because she doesn't want him, she just wnats to play head games. And he'll be alone while I'm having the time of my life. I keep telling myself that anyway.

No! No! Fuck him. And fuck being friend with him too. He can sit alone programming his computer all day. Why should I be his friend? He wasn't a very good boyfriend to me. Sure, he paid for dinner, he helped me fix my car, and that was all appreciated. But no, fuck that. He didn't respect me. He had sexy chat with his "friends" up North. He was always drooling over other chickies in my company. Fuck him, fuck that noise. I'll be happy now, thank you.

(oh, if you're reading this, which I doubt you are, all my friends that you liked and wanted to hang out with fucking hate you because you hurt me. have fun with your fragile piece of trash. I give it six months and you're ass will be alone again) I don't know if any of this will make sense tomorrow, so just take it as hormonal feminine babble.

T minus 4 hour until I get to go home.

Sun, 26 Sep 2004 02:25:22 GMT

stupid hurricane.

Fri, 17 Sep 2004 23:06:28 GMT

I tried to give Toby a bath today. He didn't like it.

Sun, 18 Apr 2004 00:40:36 GMT

you see, using the middle name gives me quite the boost.

Stolen from Fuchs

Thu, 15 Apr 2004 09:09:14 GMT

I want everyone who reads this to ask me 3 questions, no more no less. Ask me anything you want. Then I want you to go to your journal, copy and paste this allowing your friends (including myself) to ask you anything.

Sat, 20 Mar 2004 03:11:43 GMT

I'd like to give a shout out to all my anonymous users. Mere..Mal.. Rob.. um.. all three of you!

One for me *swigs tea* one for my homies *spill*

My birthday is on the 30th. Yay. I will also be broke-assed broke until April. I've decided that this will not hinder my plans for ringing in two decades of greatness. No worries, worrying won't change anything. I'll just work harder and not spend my money on silly things. Being broke won't kill me. Possibly not repairing the brake lights of my car could kill me, but I'll get over it.

Black Matt's back to work, that totally rocks. ( I offcially know too many Matts and now must start labeling them. Kinda like with Gay Rob, My Rob, and Rob the Cook.)

Dan K let us borrow Tropico and Roller Coaster thing maker game. I've learned some important lessons about gravity and killing whores.

Fri, 19 Mar 2004 23:27:12 GMT

I went over K's and swam in his pool, his pool of death.

I learned that my car has no brake lights and if I expect a man to fix it I'll need to put out.

I bought some headbands.

Sun, 29 Feb 2004 03:05:23 GMT

I had an ear infection a while back that was not fun at all. I also scratched my eye. I have not worn my contacts since. Glasses are just fine and wonderful.

A gentleman with a hemp lanyard shook my hand for using “doppelganger” in casual conversation.

I’ve started a Sorceress in Diablo 2. She lacks the confidence and the power of the assassin but damn.. that lightening is pretty cool. She’s a level 41 now. I remember when she was just a level 6 and could barely could her head up under a skull cap.

I was invited to a threesome at work. Table 21 slipped me a note that read: Paula is bicurious and has never been with a woman before. She is looking for someone to share this experience with us… blah blah blah. Although flattered, I was taken aback. I politely rejected the offer. Besides, I don’t get naked for three dollar tips. What if that’s all they could afford? Go to fucking Waffle House. And they kept grinng at me like a pair of heavily tattooed Cheshire cats. Gross. A guy from table 32 was hitting on me as well. He kept asking if I had a boyfriend and what his name was. Then I told him. Then he kept calling me Ursula Gatorade. He even left me a note that said “I want to lick you, Ursula Gatorade.”

Robbie got his motorcycle fixed, and I got to ride on it. I felt so bad ass. It was so hot. And we went to breakfast at IHOP wearing helmets and god, it was so hot and badass that “hot and badass” are the only words I could possibly use to describe it. It was a great day, one of the best. We had fun the night before, I think I made dinner (or was that another night..) and went for coffee at Denny's. We snuggeled in the morning. Badass breakfast. Good day.

Please excuse me, I’ve been sipping the bowl all day.

Christine and Matt had a fight at Denny’s last night and they both quit. Christine… oh well. But Matt! He was my buddy. He protected me and stuck up for me. It makes me sad. Thank god Devin is coming into work tonight or I’d have nobody for solace.

I talked to Mallory a few days ago and I miss her and Meredith both terribly. I think they need to move to Florida. If they don’t get a chance to visit me this year, next year I have to make a run to Pa to pick up 6 grand (thanks pop!) Maybe I’ll use part of that and the three of us could have a vacation.

Keegan and I think Dan’s going to start his trail period sometime next week.

I want to see that Passion movie to see what’s going on. I don’t remember who I discussed this with (either K or Keegan or Di or Rob) but you know, Jesus did a lot more than just die. I think he’d be pretty pissed off that his torture is all we can focus on. Like you know, the uncondiononal love and the miracles and the whole MESSAGE OF LOVE YOUR FUCKING BROTHER that we all seem to miss.

Ugh, my head’s all empty.

OH OH OH AAnd... we got a new host at work. He's totally awesome. He's super host. He.. actually works! And he plays D2. Awesome, I tell you.

That's fucked up.

Sat, 28 Feb 2004 11:58:13 GMT

You're Colombia!

You do a lot of drugs, and these have kind of distorted your view of
reality, to the point that everyone looks like an enemy. You keep trying to restore
order over your schizophrenic world view, but you don't even know which goal is your own
and which is someone else's. You're pretty sure someone needs to be punished for all
this, but who that is changes all the time. Things would be a lot better for you if
you switched to coffee, or even to decaf, but all this money would be hard to give up.

Take
the Country Quiz at the Blue Pyramid

Sat, 21 Feb 2004 02:50:58 GMT

Stuff you may have missed: A Jamacian, Friday the 13th ORAMA, Barry and his amazing giving away cookies skills, I hate you still, IHOP + Ferraris = Deadly, the death of a waitress.

I may or may not elaborate.

If everyone else jumped off a bridge, I might too.

Fri, 06 Feb 2004 18:24:39 GMT

01[x]How old am I?
02[x]How did we meet?
03[x]What is my best feature?
04[x]What do you like about me?
05[x]What do you hate about me?
06[x]Who is my best friend(s)?
07[x]What is a memory we share together?
08[x]Name something you would like to do together:
09[x]What are 5 of my favorite things?
10[x]You're putting this in your journal too right?

Fucking disgusting.

Thu, 29 Jan 2004 13:55:30 GMT

A circuit county judge remarked at the hearing of man who allegedly raped, kidnapped, and beat a woman, "Why would you want to rape her, she's no day at the beach." Granted, the woman, who is in her 50's, didn't look her best. I mean.. afterall.. the man pummeled her face. The judge... said that... in court. The judge also offered the defendant a plea bargain because he did not want to spend months in court. This is that same judge who sat in the case against the man with the trashed yard which lasted forever and a day. When later asked why he made the comment, the judge said he could not remember making that remark.

*blink blink*

Ok, ok, I advocate free speech. I also understand that a human's mind occasionally thinks comments that are... distasteful. We all think them, some of us say them, and some don't. I don't think many of us grasp the concept of having compassion when making such broad statements. Regardless, with free speech comes certain responsibilities, and consequences if abused. I think this cocksuck should be removed as soon as possible.

Let's consider the qualities of a good judge. Judges must have integrity, fairness, diligence, they should be hardworking. They must treat citizens in court with dignity and respect. And, obviously, have an extensive knowledge of the law.

The man obviously cannot be attentive if he can't even remember saying that in court. Hardworking? Offering a plea so HE DOESN'T HAVE TO SIT IN COURT? (Side note: The job of a judge, to preside in COURT) Ok.. dignity and respect? Why would you rape her? I mean, Christ's sake. What the fuck.

It boggles my fragile mind. Boggles and fills with rage.

Granted, the woman wasn't in court when he said this. But, children, courts have men and women who sit in tiny little desks and type everything down said in court word for word. And guess who reads these transcripts done in court? Possibly people involved in the case...? Maybe? just a hunch?

So this guy says "Why would he rape her, she's no day at the beach?" He says this about a woman who was beaten, raped, kidnapped and forced to drive around her abuser for several hours, a woman who's world was turned upside-down, a woman who just had her entire soul ripped apart into several pieces and spat. A man who is supposed to be unbiased, impartial, fair...regardless of race, religion, creed, sex, LOOKS, etc etc etc.

Yeah, you have the right to free speech. You also have the obligation to take responsibilities for your actions. Judge Fuckity Fuck can think or say whatever he likes when he's just Fuckity Fuck. When hes at home with the kids, when he's talking to his wife in the bedroom, when he's driving in his car. But when's he's a judge, He has certain responsibilities to uphold.

Sorry for my ramble. I just thought you might find it interesting.

Keegan stole my girlfriend.

Thu, 29 Jan 2004 08:56:15 GMT

Here's what REALLY happened. Robbie went up to PA for a business trip. I was at Stardust (his coffee house) crying my eyes out because I missed him ever SO badly on Sunday. Dan K was there, however, he was not crying his eyes out. Gay Rob (No offense, gay Rob, but clarity is needed)came into town and approx 9:30 I gave him a call. Was it 9:30? Yes. We met Gay Rob and Devin at the Alehouse. At this point I would like to thank the kind cop I accidently cut in front of for not pulling me over. Thank you. Regardless, we went to Alehouse and the boys and I decided to go to Parliment House. Somewhere along the way Keegan ended upcoming to, but I'm not sure how that came to be. I have never to been a club before, I was scurred. Yes, scurred.

Rob tried to get us all in, but only he and Devin got wrist bands. Not a problem. I started off drinking Citron but at some point in the night I stole one of Keegan's Sex on the Beach drinks. It was good. I was a little loopy so we decided to go dance. I was scurred. Keegan and I managed to dance with possibly the only straight guys in the club (It was platonic it was platonic!!! The booty shakin' didn't occur until later.) Some stuff happened.. I can't remember. I danced with this black chick named Michelle. She kept telling me to work it. She was eye level with my boobs. Some creepy guy named Matt started dancing with me, then Keegan, then me, then Keegan and so forth. We had to keep passing him back and forth because the creepiness level was high. At some point in time I was sure I was going to die. I was also sure that I would be made fun of for my white girl rhythms the next day. I went into a side bar that held promises of whips and chains, but there were no whips and chains. It was a pretty fun night.

Stuff I kinda remember:
A Latino
A nasty looking stripper. Gross, who'd pay money for that? (Devin? K?)
Another Latino that got a little too close for comfort
Grunting
Men making out everywhere
Eating Denny's
A bottle of whip cream and Jack in my tummy
Nasty Tang

All in all, an excellent evening.

Mon, 26 Jan 2004 09:21:19 GMT

So drunk.

Resolve.

Sat, 17 Jan 2004 02:51:05 GMT

Resolve:
To make a firm decision about.
To cause (a person) to reach a decision. See Synonyms at decide.
To decide or express by formal vote.
To change or convert: My resentment resolved itself into resignation.
To find a solution to; solve. See Synonyms at solve.
To remove or dispel (doubts).
To bring to a usually successful conclusion: resolve a conflict.

I have none of this.

I promise myself that I will get things done through out the day BUT after I just take a little nap.. a tiny one.. 15 minutes.. or 14 hours.

I want a pair of green cats eye glasses with rhinestones around the rims. I walk away with glasses that obviously are not green cats eye glasses with rhinestones around the rims.

I say fuck this job, it can kiss my ass as I burn it to the ground and I get a job with the same company just 20 minutes away.

I say I am going to quit smoking. This lasts for 17 hours.

I go to break up with boys and I end up sleeping with them.

I tell Maybe if she claws me one more time I am going to drown her in the bath tub, but she still lives.

From now on: I will sleep 14 hours a day, make love not war with the mens, not wear green cats eye glasses with rhinestones around the rims, smoke and smoke a lot, work at a dead end serving job, and not drown my kitties in the bathtub. Bah!

Fri, 16 Jan 2004 11:55:22 GMT

My driver's license is lost. I'm almost certain it is gone forever. I cleaned out the front and back seats of my car looking for it, a rather impressive feat if you've ever seen my car. I didn't search the trunk yet, but hell I haven't within 3 feet of that wretched thing for hmm... god who the fuck knows. I'm afraid of what is growing in there. You see, I had an assortment of items like books and coffee makers and etc just chillin back there for the longest time. There was not a problem. The one day at Publix in June, July maybe? my standard Ursula issued sandal tripped the latch when I was getting out of my car and popped the trunk open. I went to close it but the clasp was misaligned. I couldn't drive home with my books, coffee makers and etc flying out all over the road. I was tried from a long night of smoking at Denny's, sticky from not having a shower, and hot as fucking balls. I was in no mood to deal with this trunk. Luckily I had a knee high boot (just one) in my car so I took the shoe lace off of it, climbed through the back seat and jerry rigged it closed. FIXED! Triumph. All was well until the shoe lace started stretching and my trunk was perpetually open about two inches. Rain seeped in, mold grew, mold evolved. I'm sure the bacteria and fungus and god knows what else has grown thumbs a long time ago. It's possible that they developed a language, a numeric system, an elementary form of government back in September when I got my spare from the trunk. I thought I saw small huts thatched together from the upholstery and cave paintings along the walls. Who knows, by this time they might even have their own space exploration program and be sending out probes. If my driver's license is in there, it will stay in there.

Rob made my most favorite cookies in the whole fucking universe and brought some over to the apartment. That was very sweet of him and I think it will be my official highlight of the week. Then he was cuddly most of the night when I crashed there on... some night.. maybe Tuesday. And I'm a whore for the snugglin' in bed. I'll have to do something nice for him in return. Maybe I'll bake him a pair of lesbian twins or something. Oh oh oh!!!! And Keegan went to Wal Mart and got similarly delicious cookies as well. I think they are in cahoots about something. Possibly fattening me up in order to kill me, eviscerate me, and stuff my corpse full of narcotics to smuggle across the country? I can't think of any other plausible reason.

I went and got another oil change. Stupid fucking things, I just changed it three months ago! I had my pack of Mechanics at Atomic Brake and Tire look at the old girl. I was going to have all four tires replaced but Carl said I only need to have the back drivers side replaced (because my alignment is so bad it's wearing grooves into it) and the front passenger tire fixed. Then, he'd switch them all around so I had my good tires up front and my mediocre tires in the back. So, instead of going to pay 291.76 I will only need about 120.00. Sweet! Plus, my oil change was 18.05 and I gave him a 20 and he gave me 2 back. Let's see those cheap bastards at Tuffy Auto do that. Fucking whores!

New Denny's is working out very well indeed. Um... yep. Jim (server from old Denny's turned manager at New Denny's) wants to desperately hire Devin on for his graveyard. And squeaky shoed, eye makeup plastered on like paint Melinda Brown tried to transfer over and Jim said no mother fucking way. Thank goodness.

I finally sat down and beat Diablo II. It was glorious. But... I felt empty. I felt like I lost a friend. I had no direction, no more purpose in life. Baal was dead, the world was safe from the Prime Evils and there minions plaguing the land and raping its inhabitants. I knew not what to do, until the best boyfriend ever suggested I restart the game on the next difficulty.

Now, I rest.

Fri, 09 Jan 2004 23:47:43 GMT

Today I have eaten one slice cheesecake, butter and toast, one bowl cereal, one can of creamed corn, one chocolate covered oreo. I may bake cornbread this evening.

From now on, I would liked to be called Boo.

I was thinking of killing Dan K. He's just sleeping on my couch. He's been there for a while. I thought about it when I was doing the dishes. I decided against it.

I think I have a fever. The heat was turned on for whatever awful reason.

I went home from work early yesterday because I was a big ball of sniffling mucus. It was good. I stole a lemon and some honey and drank tea all day today.

I almost died. My car got yet another flat tire. This makes three since May. However, this is not the event which almost claimed my life. I was at the 7-11 near the intersection of Turkey Lake and Conroy. I was checking the air in my fixed flat tire to make sure the pressure did not drop. I locked my keys in my car. Poop. No problem, I will call my sister and have her find my spare key. My sister, if any of you know her, is the most clean organized person in the entire world. She has only lost one entire thing in her life, that would be my spare set of keys. Ok.. ok.. ok. I'll call Keegan. Her phone was turned off. Poop. I stared to cry. I was in distress, I was upset. I was helpless. They only other thing I could think to do was call my big, strong chunk o' man to come rescue me. He knew a locksmith, called him up and they arrived in an hour. In the meantime, I made friends. First was "Oh my god my tires gonna go flat but I have a coupon" Man! He was driving around from air pump to air pump putting air in his tire. It was going flat as he was driving but he had a coupon for a free tire change at a local tire place. I asked if he had a spare and he replied yes, but I don't feel like changing it. I also met Jaguar lady, he pulled up and asked if I could move my car away from the air pump. I told her no but offered no explanation as to why. She said she didn't think the hose would reach and I said, " i assure you lady, people have been reaching over me all day." she shook her head. Then these two brick layers pulled up beside me. I think they were trying to get my phone number but I am not sure. I made them buy me a pack of cigarettes. Finally, Rob came, locksmith guy saved me and all was good.

I am currently baking the cornbread. I will not be a slave to the 8*8 inch baking pan no more!!!!